How I Freed Myself

Just a few years ago (that would be around four years ago) what I have accomplished this past week would never have happened.  How dare I go against the flow? How dare I step out of the tracks that were set before me? Me, get out of my comfort zone (yeah, whatever) no sir, I like my small and comfortable bubble. I feel safe in my bubble. Oh.. how these past few years have changed.  For “goodness sake” this man (he looks completely innocent… doesn’t he?) decided to in 2013

(just sitting and relaxing on the front porch)
(just sitting and relaxing on the front porch)

that my “safe bubble” had to be popped.  We had a weekend free from our lovely daughters. 239

photo 2

As we were driving too I do not know where, Ryan is making phone calls, and speaking of prices of “something”.  Words such as “a couple” and a “single drop” would come out.  Here I was, thinking how sweet he was for making dinner reservations.  I was so happy with him, but since we were on the thruway, where in God’s Green Planet are we going?  After all the phone calls, he looks over at me, with this “look”, that look of “I got something planned”.

He say’s “How would you like to do something reckless?” What I think, something reckless to me was buying a new plant that would die in about a week from me over tending to it.  He goes, “we are going ski diving and we are about 20 minutes away, how does that sound”? “WTH, my feet belong on planet earth” was my reply.  Within seconds, I am formatting everything that could possibly go wrong and the hospital bills that could accrue.

As we talked, yes, ski diving was on my bucket list, but it was something that he did say that was true.  A lot of people do have things on their bucket list, but actually pursuing them is something totally different. So I complied, I sat through the movie (which I swear was from the 80’s)…hesitantly participated in the “how” to get the gear on and off.  I was trembling, my palms sweaty, I don’t think my words were actually understandable as I get my gear on, boarded a plan that I swear was from the 70’s sat in the corner like a disobedient child with dice hanging in the corner.

I went throw the motions of backing up and then I felt the cold air hit me like a ton of bricks.  Holy hell, this is happening and there is no way out of it.  I wanted to be put back on the ground where it was safe.  Then again, while I am  up here, I might as well take the jump.  So, I rocked and flipped out of the plane.

It was a shock to my system on all levels, with my eyes closed tightly I let out of a blood curdily scream.  When the parachute was finally open (which felt like a life time, and I was concerned that we got the “bad one”) I opened my eyes then it happened, a switch was clicked on.  I dove out of a plane into the ski, the parachute opened, and I did it! The  view was spectacular, no it was breathtaking.  I felt so liberated. I felt free. I accomplished something that so many talk about, but so few actually follow through and do.  As we floated to the ground, I did stumble for my knees were shaking. and I was so overwhelmed with what I had just seen and done.

IMG_20130727_151838 I took a picture of Ryan floating to the ground (he decided to not take a picture of me, for they had a bet going on if I was actually going to make it to the ground without falling). (lovely boyfriend at the time).

A year later in the summer of 2014, I did something else that was another big stepping stone for me in actually doing something on my bucket list at that was chopping of 12 inches of my hair

Ryan playing with my hair – he thinks he is funny (actually it was)…
Summer of 2014

I had always wanted to donate my hair to locks of love, it took me a couple of weeks, but I finally did it. I did it! To me this was another thing that liberated me and freed me.  Something that pushed me out of my bubble and motivated me in succeeding. The reason why I have shared two life events with you, is that these two events amongst others have enlightened me in that, I do not have to  always stay on the safe road.  That If I want it, I must get out of my bubble, I must extend my comfort zones.  These accomplishments (small to some, but huge in my personal opinion ) showed me that I am strong enough to pursue what I want to do, and to take the naysayers with a grain of salt.

Ryan has been my motivator, the one to push me out of comfort zone, and this I say to you, get out of your comfort zone every now and then, for who knows what you can accomplish!!!



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